I've recently revisited this one site for natural hair. Last night I washed my dirty, unruly mop and was looking for inspiration. Backstory: I stopped relaxing my hair while I was still in college. Maybe it was 2003, around the time I first started working at my last job. I couldn't handle the maintenance and the constant breakage with the chemicals. And I was dyeing my hair purple with Manic Panic a lot, too. My hair was upset. Before taking the plunge, I eased myself into it by wearing a lot of braids, you know hair extensions. They were all different colors but mostly purple. I was going through a phase. Finally, around winter break, I cut off all the straight ends so the natural growth could come in unrestrained. Haven't looked back since.

I've had issues with others finding my hair offensive. It bothers me a lot when people focus on that. I resolved to eliminate the questions and stares by wearing a lot of headwraps. I still do. I was most bothered by the Brown folks, my people who met my hair with opposition. Supervisor at the former job turned her nose up at me every chance she got. Looked down on me cos I didn't have straight hair. Her counterpart expressed such condescending surprise when she saw old photos of me with straight hair(heat-treated, not relaxed). She said, "wow, look at all that hair! So long, what happened?" A friend's aunt told me a woman's hair is her crowning glory then tried to make me feel badly about mine. I wanted to ask her if she believed that, why did she try so hard to convert her beautiful hair into something unnatural?  

My mother had been sporting a nice 'fro for awhile. Her hair was falling out, and it was very practical. I was jealous cos it didn't take much. Too bad it was stress related and it quickly bounced back. She was back to the relaxer. Tam isn't as adventurous as I am so she wouldn't go natural. And she's in school, has a twenty month old and a fiance. She lives in a town with very few salons for people of color. She does the braids thing or relaxes at home. Tam loves my hair. Any excuse for her to get her hands on my head, she'll find it. I don't mind. It's soothing to have someone who knows your head groom and style you. I think she loves it more that it's natural.

Guy suggested I get myself a 'fro. My hair is too loose for that. I'd rather lop the entire thing off and start over. However, I realize I worked so hard to get my hair to where I can enjoy it that I won't.

I need a better routine. I used to be all about the Frizz Ease but that stuff was expensive. And I can't locate all the products anymore since they changed the line. Now I use Garnier Fructis leave-in conditioner daily. I shampoo with Herbal Essences Totally Twisted. Neither I'm sure are made for my hair type but they do the job, clean and smooth. I twisted up my hair to keep it together after the 'pooing and this is what it looks like:

( fraggle rock )

I wish it still looked like it did in May of '06 :
( dear sweet baby 'fro )

And before you ask, yes I was twenty-three then. Not still in high school. College senior. We don't grow in my family.

I'm thinking too much about hair when I should be thinking about laundry. And sustenance. Ah well. I'll probably untwist my hair and wear it frizzy to work tomorrow.